While my GME contract has clear delineations of my job responsibilities as a resident, it is amazing how much additional work we do to survive in the workplace. Back when I was working for the government, nobody breached their job descriptions–there was even a person designated to brew the morning coffee.

In keeping with a concise entry, the following is a list of some tasks I accomplished today. You can decide which ones are reasonable or outright ludicrous:

• Emptied my garbage can into the dumpster: a patient threw a banana peel and apple core in it at 9am–I did not want my exam room to smell like banana the entire day
• Checked my patient’s vision, dilated, them, and filled out a driver’s license renewal form.
• Refused to fill out a disability application for a free Metrocard on an otherwise healthy 33 year-old guy who supposedly had a back injury before he moved to this country. He also had 20/15 acuity.
• Called a primary care physician’s office for records.
• Faxed physical exam requisitions to physician’s office.
• Cleaned the computer keyboard with alcohol swabs.
• Faxed forms to schedule my surgical cases.
• Asked surgical scheduler why he did not fax my surgical cases.
• Spent 2 hrs entering clinic notes on our broken EHR.
• Glared at technician who bypassed my exam lane 3 times while attempting to “find” me to place a patient chart. I was the only physician examining patients in the entire hallway of lanes.
• Called patient to remind her for surgery for tomorrow.
• Performed forced ductions on a STAT 9pm consult in the operating room for someone s/p orbital floor fracture repair. ENT had already closed up the incisions.

medicine work

The majority of newer public restrooms have incorporated touch-free technologies that helps us avoid “contaminating” our hands with germs. Airports were one of the earliest adopters of hands-free flushing, faucet use, soap dispensing, and towel dispensing. Our hospital, too, now has these devices in the newer wings.

The irony, however, of hands-free technology is that it’s almost never incorporated in the restroom door! Aside from the handicap entrances, every single door I’ve seen requires you to turn the handle, and violate your recently cleaned hands!

These same thoughts have crossed others as well. Some people wait until someone else enters the restroom before dashing out. Others use a paper towel to grasp the door handle.  Whatever the case may be, urban planning came up short this time.

misc

I run my server from GoDaddy, the company that hosts those risque SuperBowl commercials annually. I signed up initially because they offer a SSH login and have cheap rates. The server lag, however, is horrible. I automated an annual sign-up initially, and was planning to cancel my service last month when the contract expired.

Unfortunately, I forgot to cancel the subscription since I was caught up managing some emergency room traumas that week.

Dang you, residency. Damn you, GoDaddy. None of the caching mechanisms ever worked to speed up this website. In fact, I tested the site on a Canadian server, and the ping time was less than half of that of the GoDaddy server. I guess I have to live with it for another year. If you are a web hosting service that buys off GoDaddy fees for switching hosts, contact me!

computing rant

I came across the nastiest, gnarliest, most-awesome scalpel this week, when my attending called for the “Number 12 blade”. In surgery, I’ve only dealt with No. 10, 11, and 15 blades.  I think the picture says it all:

medicine medicine

Last week our departmental chairman suckered me into being the test subject for a pneumatic retinopexy demonstration. The near-horizontal angle portrayed in this photo allows for withdrawal of vitreous to create space for injection of an intraocular gas. After adequate removal of vitreous, the syringe is tilted up at a 45-degree angle to inject the gas. This procedure allows for repair of a superior detachment in the office.

medicine ophthalmology